I put down my last card and smiled. I won…or at least I thought I had. Finally. Kim and I were playing rummy while on vacation in the Netherlands last summer. She was beating me badly. I had lost every hand. Then Kim reminded me that I needed to discard to finish the game. I did not have any cards left, so I would have to play another round. Kim drew a card, placed the others on the table, and discarded her final one. She won that hand.
I am not good at playing cards
I like playing cards. Poker, rummy, Uno. You name the game, and I probably enjoy it. The problem is that I am not good at any of them. I lose most of the time. I don’t pay much attention while playing and usually do not have a strategy in mind. Instead, I simply do the best I can and hope for a win now and then. The bottom line is that I do not care that much if I lose. I don’t. My attitude is much different when it comes to life.
Why I wrote this billboard
Playing cards is a good analogy to life. My experience is that you do not get to pick your cards often. Rather you are dealt good cards, or bad cards, and you have to do the best you can with the cards you get. I wrote this billboard as a reminder that I need to discard all the bad cards that I can. With that thought in mind, here are three cards that I discarded over the years. I recommend you do the same if you have these cards in your hand.
You got to know when to hold ’em,
The Gambler by Kenny Rogers
Know when to fold ’em,
Know when to walk away,
And know when to run.
You never count your money
When you’re sittin’ at the table.
There’ll be time enough for countin’
When the dealing’s done.
Discard bad card #1 – life is fair
This card is useless. Life is not fair. It isn’t. I never really believed this one was true, but wished it were at times. Many things have happened to me that were not fair. The same is true for all of us. It does not matter, so why lie to yourself? I no longer ask myself – was that fair? Instead, I ask a more relevant question – what am I going to do next?
Discard bad card #2 – it is not my fault
I used to play this card a lot which was stupid. When things in my life go wrong, I always bear some share of the blame. After my divorce, I listened to a sermon series from Andy Stanley entitled Starting Over. It was extremely helpful. In one episode he talks about owning up to my part of the problem. He was right. I was at least 50% responsible for the divorce. No bones about it. After I admitted this fact, it became easier to move forward. It is not my fault is a card you should get rid of as I did.
Discard bad card #3 – I can do anything
Many self-help books and gurus believe the mantra that you can do anything. You cannot. Don’t fool yourself. I have written about this topic before so I will not belabor the point. The fact is that you cannot do anything you want. No one can. It is best to focus your efforts on your strengths, passions, and desires, rather than believe that anything is possible for all of us. If you are holding this card in your hand – get rid of it.
How I incorporated this billboard into my life
I realize that life is not fair, recognize that many things are my fault, and that I cannot do anything. I got rid of a few other bad cards in my hand. Cards like everything happens for a reason, love is all you need, and money is the root of all evil. Now, I am trying to play my cards the best I can. Who knows – I may win a few more games.
What about you?
Are you holding on to bad cards? If so, good for you. If not, discard them, and draw another one from the deck. There is no good reason to hold onto bad cards.
You must discard to win. Don’t hold on to bad cards that life deals you.
Dad